Tuesday, December 15, 2009

People Don't Like Being Called Egomaniacs.

June 26, 1994

Dear Bethany,

No offense to Cathy but she has a HUGE ego. She was saying things like "I'm really good at this... I do a good job with that..." Then she did five front flips and then said "well i CAN do ten". oh GOD.
We also played a lot of tennis. A tennis teacher saw us playing and said we were really good and she's going to give us a tennis lessonon Tuesday at 9am. Anyway, tennis was fun but there were tons of bees and Cathy and I are both wicked scared of them.
Guess what?? Even though I still like Patrick (alias: Lame Boy), I'm in love with an older man (about 20) . His name is Brian. He is SO cute. He has blonde hair, blue eyes and glasses... not nerdy glasses, social looking glasses. He is a very good tennis player and he has a twin brother. Brian is also very nice. He always lets my brother hang around with him even though he's a few years older. Isn't that sweet?

A couple things about Cathy: Cathy's favorite animal is a horse. She likes them because they are cool, sweet, adorable, fun to ride on and be with etc. etc. She is probably my most obnoxious friend (besides Allison who I'm in a fight with) For instance, if I say something like "you're so egotistical" a couple things will happen:
1. she'll look at me like i have two heads.
2. she'll go "what's egotistical?" this is annoying for two reasons: she stretches out the "what's", and she makes every syllable in "egotistical" long.

INTERRUPTION: A funny thing just happened. Cathy goes, "wouldn't it be weird if when we were grandparents I found your journal and you found mine?" I agreed, and she said "We'd both be pretty mad because admit it, we both have some bad things about each other in our journals."

Well gotta go cause Dad's here and waiting very impatiently.

This is actually an edited down version of this journal entry. Since Cathy liked writing too, we would write every night that she was visiting me in New Hampshire. And it was an unspoken competition to see who would write for the longest, write the most, give up first. So I go on and on for pages in every journal entry this week.

An older man?? Wow. I'm actually pretty disturbed by the way I phrase that. It's kind of icky. And by kind of I mean extremely. But at least he had "social looking glasses". I'm sure there's some sort of fine distinction there. It's certainly an evocative phrase. Like, glasses that allow him to actually socialize and not just be a loser?

Do I have any friends I actually like?? Is there anyone I do NOT have complaints about?? I am so hyper aware of other people's faults. It really sounds miserable. I'm kiiiind of a terrible person at this point, huh?

What I love most is that I bitch about how Cathy reacts to my comment. "You're so egotistical". In what context am I saying this?? Do I understand how mean a comment that is?? Do I take any responsibility for the consequences of arbitrarily telling my friend she's an ego maniac?? The answer, of course, is no. The obnoxious person in this scenario is Cathy. Apparently because of the look she gives me and the way she speaks slowly. With syllables.

At least Cathy tells it like it is-- admitting that we both bitch about each other in our journals. I would LOVE to see what she wrote about me on this trip. I hope that at least in her journal she called me on my bullshit.

Christ, I was one irritable eleven year old.

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