Saturday, January 23, 2010

As Requested.

The Working Women of Corey's Brain with Your Host Miss Blah Blah (clapping)...

Thank you, thank you. Now onto the first interview. Breanna.

Q: Breanna, what part of Corey's body do you work in?

A: I work in the brain.

Q: What is your job there?

A: I work with thoughts, and since I'm a genie I try to make her wishful thoughts come true.

Q: What do you think of logic?

A: Yuck, logic is so trapped. You can tell Corey hates logic because she hates math and math is very logical.

Q: Corey loves writing... does that have anything to do with logic?

A: No of course not . Writing is so free and thoughtful. I think it's positively lovely that she likes it.

Q: Is there any reason you took up thoughts?

A: Well, I don't like to think of it as a reason since I hate reasons but I thought it would be nice to take up thoughts since this has gone through generations of my family. I'm having a baby soon and I hope he or she takes up thoughts.

Q: Do you hope to have a boy or a girl?

A: Definitely a girl.

Q: Is there any reason you want a girl instead of a boy?

A: NO NOT A REASON!! But I THINK a girl would be nicer because boys have been proven to be better at math.

Q: Who else works in the brain with you?

A: Well there's Belle, the logic brain and Bonnie who tells the other parts of Corey's anatomy what to do.

Q: I take it you're not too fond of Belle?

A: Not at all. Her section of the brain is so neat and organized. She even has one of those little cabinets to keep math problems in.

Q: Who is your husband?

A: My husband is the thoughts of Corey's love, Patrick's brain.

Q: Does he have the same ideas as you?

A: Yes, except with him the logic takes over. He is so very weak.

I don't think this requires much commentary. It is another project I worked on in my journal, a series of interviews like these go on for a week or two and "Miss Blah Blah" interviews different parts of my brain.
Obviously the best part of this interview is my assessment of how Patrick's brain works. I am pretty impressed with the succinct and creative way I tackle the differences between men and women... it explains a lot.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Corey+ Mr. Mellow = Love 4ever

September 7, 1994

Dear Bethany,
Today I'm at Allison's. Mom and Dad are taking my brother to boarding school. You know what I hate about him going to boarding school? Everything I say my mom will reply, "After we get your brother off to school." I'm important too!!! I have troubles too! I need stuff for school! WHY ME?

Allison and I have been looking through her sister Rachel's magazines like YM and Seventeen and stuff. Right now Allison is giving me a test on what kind of guy I would attract. It's fun. I attract: MR. MELLOW:

"Having a good time is very important to this guy. He's witty, relaxed and happy to entertain you (as long as it doesn't take too much effort). Rarely angry, he takes everything in stride and tends to forgive quickly."

Cool huh?


If only the quizzes in YM and Seventeen had proved the be right. It really would have saved me from a lot of big mistakes. This guy sounds great, but I don't seem to manage finding him. Even Patrick is kind of a neurotic mess. I don't know about his wit (god forbid i TALK to the guy) but he definitely was not relaxed.
More importantly, how did I manage to answer questions that led me to that result?? What mellow dude would want to date the narcissistic, angst ridden DISASTER of an 11 year old that I was?? What did I say to make Seventeen Magazine believe I was deserving of some chilled out wonderful guy?

(I mean, see the first paragraph of this SAME ENTRY. My self pity and victim complex knows no bounds.)

In case you didn't notice, there is a huge chronological break between this entry and the last one. That is because I got really boring during the summer months and my journal is full of exciting information like what I ate and how good my tennis game/lizard-house-making/singing/swimming was.