Friday, February 26, 2010

The Plot to Kill Kristen.

January 21, 1995

Dear Bethany,

Hi! No, Farryl hasn't forgiven me, even though I wrote her yet another apology letter. But this was (I thought) written much better.
Oh, by the way, I re-decorated my closet You know, painted the shelves. It looks SO COOL. Like one shelf has a sun and a moon. One has a rainbow, one is lots of stickers and one is all my friends signing in.
Diana wrote: "To Cor, I'm in front cause I'm the your best of friends. Pretty cool closet and many more."
Allison wrote: "Corey, I hope Kristen dies." ... At the time Allison was and still is mad at Kristen for writing a secret admirer note to Reese, Allison's boyfriend.


This marks the moment I learned that even the best written apology note won't forgive complete evil bitchiness. The only thing I'm sure about with this note is that I spent more time congratulating myself on the high quality of the writing than I did actually accepting responsibility for what I did.

As for the closet... this was also known as my "office". I'm not kidding. My little walk in closet was my office where I sat and did "work". This is why I spent so much time decorating it.

Allison's message, just to clarify, was written in our secret language. I wish I could replicate it here, but sadly there is no font for our complex system of weird little symbols. We often used it to plot the deaths of our fellow classmates.

Poor Kristen. Allison was arguably the prettiest little 11 year old ever, and Kristen just simply had no shot with Reese. Given that, its surprising Allison even gave a shit that Kristen wrote Reese a note... no one was getting that boy away from Allison. No one.

...rainbows and stickers. still, corey? really? aren't we getting a little old for that.
when do i get cool???

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